Reclaiming his Heart
by backlash
Summary: Trowa makes a mistake that could cost him Quatre
1. Default Chapter Title

_Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam wing or any of the characters. Honest_

# Reclaiming his Heart

** by [Backlash][1]**

Quatre had finally gotten his buissness done and could go home to Trowa as soon as tomorrow. He had transferred ownership of his businesses to his sisters. They loved the work and it sucked the life out of him. Soon he would be able to have loads of spare time to spend with Trowa and his friends. They all kept in close contact since the war ended.

Trowa went out with Duo to celebrate Quatre coming home. They didn't know when he was coming home but Duo always could find a way to celebrate. They had loads of drinks though Trowa shouldn't have. He once promised Quatre he wouldn't drink anymore because he blacked out whenever he did. He couldn't help it though he missed Quatre so much.

The next morning Trowa woke up with a terrible headache. He heard a moan and next to him was a naked Duo. Then he noticed he was naked to. Duo woke up and looked at Trowa. On the stand was a tube of lubricant. "Oh no what did we do?"

"We had sex Trowa. Come on don't you remember?"

The door suddenly opened and a cheerful Quatre yelled. "Trowa I'm home." then he saw them and the smile dropped. Quatre's face drained of all it's color. Heero was right behind Quatre and he saw his Duo naked with Quatre's Trowa.

"Quatre I'm sorry." he got up wrapping a sheet around him.

Quatre didn't say anything. He lost his ability to speak he couldn't believe it. Trowa and his supposedly best friend. Quatre couldn't look at him.

"Quatre I was drunk I didn't mean to. It was an accident."

"So you tripped and fell and had sex yeah right." Heero spoke up and then left.

Quatre still stood silently. "Quatre I'm sorry."

"I know you are but it hurts to much to be with you. I can't good bye Trowa." Quatre ran out of the house in tears. "QUATRE! Don't go." 

Outside the house Quatre spotted Heero standing by a tree with his head down. His hand covering his face. Quatre went over to him and placed his hand on his shoulder. That's when Heero looked at him and Quatre saw the tears.

Quatre knew it was a risk but he pulled Heero into an embrace. "I'm sorry Heero. It'll be allright."

"Me too. I know how much you love him. I can't stay here. I have to leave."

"I know."

"You can't stay either come with me?"

"All right. Maybe together it will be easier. I promise not to tell anyone you cried."

"You better not."

Shall I go on? 

   [1]: Mailto:backdrop001@msn.com



	2. Default Chapter Title

_Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam wing or any of the characters. Honest_

# Reclaiming his Heart

##### Part 2

** by [Backlash][1]**

Quatre finished packing the rest of his things when Heero came in. "Are you ready?" asked Heero Quatre nodded as Trowa came in. "I'll put this in the car." Heero reluctantly left.

Quatre walked over to the window and looked out. Trowa stared in silence and said after a few seconds. "Please don't go."

"I need time away." Quatre answered softly.

"Why are you punishing me. You know how I get when I drink."

"Yes but I also know that you broke your promise."

"Quatre, I've been so lonely without you. I just needed some comfort and drinking provides that. If you hadn't been working none stop at a place you hate this wouldn't of happened."

"It's my fault. I realize that." admitted Quatre.

"No it not I didn't mean....."

"Goodbye Trowa. Maybe after some time I'll come back. I just need some time to contemplate."

Quatre walked over to the door but first gave Trowa a kiss on the cheek. Then he took his leave. Trowa touched his cheek wanting to feel Quatre's warm lips one last time. He watched out the window as Quatre headed for the car as Heero finished loading it. He looked up at the window one last time and saw Trowa. 

Then he drove off with Heero. A single tear fell down Trowa's cheek . "I will never love anyone again." then he left to see his sister. The last person left who gave a damn about him. Maybe with her he could find some peace.

********************************************

A few months later................

Quatre traveled everywhere with Heero. They supported eachother and Heero would go on and on about Wufei. Quatre knew why but Heero didn't seem to get it.

"When are you going to tell him Heero?"

"Tell who what?"

"Wufei that you love him."

"You no something Quatre. Being with you these last few months had softened me. You have learned to read me like a book haven't you?"

"You know he loves you too."

"How do you know?" asked Heero.

"Because I told him." said a voice they turned to see Wufei in the doorway.

***************************

Quatre went for a walk to give them some time together. He had this burning pain in his heart for quite some time now. Some one he cared for was very sad and in a great deal of pain. He just couldn't place it though.

He had tried to call Trowa just two days after he left. Trowa had left Quatre missed him so much and felt that he shouldn't have left the way he did. He didn't just leave because he was hurt though. He didn't think Heero should be alone not at that time.

He just wanted his Trowa back. It felt it was his fault after all that stupid business took some much of his time away from Trowa. He had never said it had hurt him so much. If he had known he would have left the company a lot sooner. Nothing was more important to him then Trowa nothing. He wished he could go back and do things differently but he can't.

When he left he left his heart. Trowa gave him love and understanding and now he felt as though he messed everything up by running away. Quatre continued to stare at the sky which seemed pointless. He pulled out a photo he carried of him and Trowa together. "Where are you Trowa?"

"You might not want to know. After what I tell you." said Wufei as he came up behind him holding Heero's hand.

"What do you mean?"

"He isn't the same. He was starting to get better until Catherine died in a car crash. Now he just sits in a rented cabin and drinks all the time. He won't talk to anyone he's like a zombie. If anyone can get through to him it's you."

Quatre didn't need any convincing. Trowa needed him and that's all he needed to know. Quatre packed him stuff and got on a plane at know time at all. Next stop Trowa. He just hoped he wasn't to late.

   [1]: Mailto:backdrop001@msn.com



	3. Default Chapter Title

_ Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam wing or any of the characters_

# Reclaiming his heart

#####  Part 3

** By [Backlash][1]**

Quatre was riding in a cab he when it drove by a liquor store. An idea began to form and he had the cab drop him off there. _ I can play his game._He thought.

Trowa began frantically cleaning his apartment after getting that call from Heero.

_Flashback_

"What is it?" asked Trowa as he answered his phone.

"I just thought you'd like to know Quatre is on his way there."

"What!?"

"He heard about your situation. Contrary to your opinion of yourself he still loves and worries about you. If you care at all clean yourself up."

End Flashback

Trowa finished cleaning then took a shower and put on some clean clothes. He then dumped out all his liquor bottles. Trowa wasn't addicted to alchohol he just drank when he was depressed. He waited patiently for Quatre to arrive. Knowing Quatre cared made him feel something he hadn't felt in a long time.

Quatre finally was outside when Trowa opened the door to let him in. He was holding an almost empty bottle of scotch and was walking funny. It was apparent to Trowa that Quatre was drunk. Quatre kept giggling. "Hey Trowa." He said as they both went inside Trowa looking at him with disbelief. 

Quatre was staring at Trowa with a predatory smile. Quatre pushed Trowa against the wall and began to kiss Trowa's neck. "Quatre don't. mmmmm." Trowa was silence by Quatre's mouth. Quatre began ripping Trowa's shirt off. Trowa was resisting and Quatre asked in a very alluring voice. "Don't you want me?"

Trowa kissed back but knew it wasn't right and pulled away. Quatre became very angry. "What's the matter I give and give and still it's not enough for you!" 

"Quatre you're drunk. This isn't you." Trowa insisted.

"Is that so. Well than who am I. The person who loved you more than anything? The person who you lied to? The person you claimed to love. The person who's best friend you fucked. Or maybe the person who gave up his father's buissness so he could be with you only to come home and have his world shattered. Maybe you didn't love me at all maybe it was revenge for what I did to you when I was in the wing zero." Quatre picked up a plant and threw it against the wall. When it shattered he fell to the ground and began to cry. 

Trowa went to him and held him as he cried. "What have I done?" Quatre soon fell asleep in his arms. Trowa carried him to his bed and covered him up. Before leaving the room he kissed Quatre on the forehead.

Quatre woke up with a killer headache the next morning. "Oh man what hit me?" 

"Nothing hit you except your hangover." Trowa was slightly amused with the situation. He smiled. Quatre put the pillow over his face trying to shield his eyes from the light. "Why in the heck would you put yourself through this torment repeatedly is beyond me." 

"Why would you drink for Quatre? It's not like you." 

"You seem to love it. I wanted to see what the big deal is."

"Well you are certaintly an emotional drunk. I think liquor for you is like a truth serom.."

"Did I do something embarrassing?" asked Quatre. 

"No not at all." Trowa smiled. 

"For some reason I don't believe you." Quatre said in a playful tone. 

"Would I lie?" 

"I was sorry to hear about Catherine. I know you loved her." 

"Thank you. Is that why you came?" asked Trowa. 

"Partly." 

"Partly?" 

"I missed you. I still love you. In case that was ever in question." 

"Are you coming back to me Quatre?" Trowa asked hopefully. 

"I want to Trowa but. It's not that easy I've been thinking about this. I can't trust you not now anyway. I just don't know anything anymore. The only thing I know for sure is I love you." 

"I understand. I love you too." He said sadly. 

"I'm not ready to give you up though. I can't watch you drink your life away either. I just don't know what to do with you. You make me nuts." 

"Trowa smiled and took Quatre in his arms. "I never will let you go again. I will find a way to prove to you that you can trust me. Will you stay and give me a chance to?" 

Quatre kissed him on the cheek and hugged him back.. Then he clutched his head. "Man how long will this stupid hangover last?" 

TBC 

   [1]: Mailto:backdrop001@msn.com



	4. Chapter 4

reclaiming his heart 4  _ Disclaimer: I do not own gundam wing or any characters and so on_

Reclaiming his heart Part 4

It has been a year since Quatre moved in with Trowa. Trowa continued to go to AA and was currently in therapy. He knew he wasn't an alcoholic but went to AA just to cover his bases that and he didn't want Quatre to think he was in denial.

Although they were living under the same roof there really weren't together. They hadn't kissed or touched in anyway except for when Quatre hugged him. The whole situation was beginning to frustrate Trowa immensely. Not being able to touch Quatre was pure torture. He didn't want to complain not when Quatre had every right to hate him yet came back when Trowa needed him. 

Quatre was smiling to himself as he waited for Trowa on the porch. He was so proud of all the progress Trowa has made and Trowa hasn't had a single drink. Instead of drinking he talks out his problem with Quatre instead of hiding them in a bottle. Trowa still had some trouble expressing himself but was becoming more and more open about his feelings.

As Trowa's car pulled up Quatre sensed uncertainly from Trowa. Trowa sat down next to Quatre. "Quatre?"

"Yes." Quatre answered in a caring voice.

"Sunday is Cathy's birthday and I still haven't been to her grave not once. I guess I'm scared to face here so to speak. I've made such a mess of my life."

Quatre took Trowa's hand and kissed it affectionately. It warmed Trowa's heart. "She would be very proud of you Trowa. You've made remarkable progress and if there is a heaven I'm sure she's watching over you smiling."

"I think I'll go visit her grave on her birthday. Thank you. I guess I'm just nervous." Quatre released Trowa's hand and looked at him and asked. 

"Would you like me to come with you? I mean for moral support."

Trowa smiled and said, "Thank you." Trowa leaned in close to Quatre about to kiss him when Quatre backed away. "It's getting late. Night Trowa." Quatre went inside.

Trowa remained outside. "So close yet so far away." Then it began to rain._ He certainly isn't making this easy on me is he? _

Quatre went to his room the to the bathroom and splashed some cold water on his face. When he returned to his room and smiled. "He's not making this easy." Quatre pulled out a drawer and noticed a picture it was one of him and Duo. With writing under it that said 'Best Friends Forever'. Quatre looked at it for a moment and smiled he missed his best friend. Was it really fair to forgive Trowa and not Duo? He hadn't even spoke to him or let him explain or even apologize.

************************************************************************

The next day Quatre decided to call Heero and ask if had heard from Duo. Apparently he had they had mended fences and now were friends. Nothing more than that though because Heero and Wufei were quite happy together. Quatre had never seen Heero smile so much. They were even talking about Marriage. Heero gave him Duo's address and Quatre decided to pay his friend a visit.

Quatre went up to the door and wanted to knock but was afraid. He paced in front of the door and began to leave. Then stopped and went back to the door. He took a couple deep breaths. "Quatre?" a voice said behind him. It was Duo of course.

"eh .. Hi Duo."

Duo noticed that Quatre was uncertain and unlocked the door and pulled him inside. Quatre sat at the table and Duo returned with some hot chocolate. The both sat in silence staring at their coca . "If you came for an apology Quatre well then. I'm sorry I don't know what happened. We were drinking and I remember kissing Trowa on the forehead as comfort nothing else I swear. I we woke up and we were naked and there was lube in my hand so I assumed we had sex. I'm so sorry please I miss my best friend." Tears were streaming down his face. Quatre said nothing.

Quatre kneeled in front of him and smiled. Then he took his friend in his arms and hugged him tightly. It only made Duo cry more. "I forgive you Duo. I'm sorry to."

Still holding each other Duo asked, "You're sorry? You didn't do anything wrong Q. You're the best friend I've ever had and I messed it up."

"I was still mad at you but then last night I came across a picture of us and remembered how much I missed you. We should have spoke before now I guess I was afraid to face you. I've missed you and I want my friend back. So what do you say?" Duo hugged harder and so Quatre got his answer.

They spent the whole day talking about their lives catching one another up. Duo was doing well for himself and was dating someone who he wouldn't name just yet he didn't want to jinx it.

Quatre told Duo about his current situation with Trowa as well they cried and laughed. It was nice it felt like old times. Duo understood that Quatre needed time before he would trust him fully but he was glad to have his friend back.

************************************************************

Sunday.

Quatre and Trowa had just returned from the cemetery. Trowa spoke to Catherine told her how much he loved her and even brought flowers to her headstone. Quatre held him hand the whole time.

Trowa sat silently on the couch. Quatre sat next to him and pulled Trowa into his arms and Trowa broke down. He began to cry. Quatre spoke in a soft voice and stroked Trowa's hair. "It's all right Trowa. Just let it out." Quatre placed a soft kiss on Trowa's head. "Thank you for being here Quatre."

"Always." Trowa touched Quatre's face and his heart melted. Trowa lips touched Quatre's and they began to kiss. Quatre could feel his love and warmth but sadly he pulled away and stood up. "We can't do this Trowa."

"But why Quatre. Don't you love me anymore?"

"I could never stop loving you, this just can't happen."

"Give me one reason why not?"

"Fear." Then Quatre ran to his room. Quatre fell to the floor and cried.

Trowa sat back down on the coach and cried himself to sleep.

TBC 


End file.
